Prince Abdul Bunda Finally Escapes Nigeria

Prince Abdul Bunda, son of murdered Nigerian ruler, King Bundu Koroma, arrived in the UK yesterday, having spent the past six years sending thousands of fruitless e-mails to British citizens, begging for their assistance.

Abdul (35), whose father was killed by his own brother in 2008 over a monetary dispute, has spent more than half a decade in hiding, sending e-mail after e-mail in the hope he would eventually find someone from the UK willing to assist him in moving his late father’s thirty million dollar fortune out of Nigeria.

Despite his efforts, His Royal Highness, Prince Abdul was unable to find anyone prepared to offer help, even after offering a reward of almost ten million dollars to anyone who would send him their bank account details and the cost of a one-way air ticket.

“It is not understandable to me,” Abdul told us after arriving in the UK. “I am wishing to escape the persecution of my being in Nigeria, and am wishing to send one third my father’s treasure of gold and money, but yet nobody is wishing to receive it.”

No-one, that is, except unemployed Bristol man, Alan Brown (42), who received an e-mail from the prince last month, and instantly felt compelled to lend a hand in any way he could.

ROBBED

“Abdul’s story is a terrible one,” Alan said at the house he shares with his mother, Ethel (71). “His father was murdered in cold blood by his maniac uncle, his sister committed suicide, he was robbed of his throne and forced into hiding, then everyone he contacted seems to have assumed his mails were some kind of scam or something. He’s really had a rough time of it.”

Added Alan: “The fact that no-one else tried to help the poor fellow before now almost makes me ashamed to be British.”

Although jobless Alan claims having the opportunity to help his fellow man is in itself reward enough, Prince Abdul has insisted he accept a one third share of the imported fortune, as per their original written agreement.

“It seems like an awful lot of money for very little,” Alan admitted. “I mean all I did was let the chap use my bank account to transfer his dead father’s fortune into, and sent him seventy five pounds towards his flight over here. I’m not sure what it is in pounds, but ten million dollars seems a bit much.”

As Bunda is still concerned for his own safety, Alan has offered to rent him his back bedroom, which the exiled prince has readily agreed to.

“I was being despaired of giving up on hoping to find an assistance to escape my evil uncle’s ways,” a visibly emotional Bunda said. “So I am thanking God for your Alan Brown, that I may at last be feeling the taste of free air in my lungs and heart.”

Abdul’s uncle – Nigeria’s King Bangra Koroma – was unavailable for comment on his nephew’s escape from his tyrannical clutches, yesterday. However, a spokesman for the King is reported to have said: “Curses!”

Get More of this Stuff
Join the NewsThing newsletter today

Enjoying our no-nonsense, hard-hitting investigative journalism here on NewsThing? Then stick in your details and get the weekly newsletter from the UK's newest and fastest-growing news satire site. Ensure you never miss another story again, and get to read the occasional exclusive not available on the site.

If you've read this far, you've missed the bit where you put in your details. Move your eyes about half an inch up the page.

Start spreading the news...Share on Google+0Share on LinkedIn0Tweet about this on TwitterShare on Tumblr0Pin on Pinterest0Share on Facebook10

Leave a Reply

*